At a recent Wild Inner Stillness retreat, I offered a demonstration of primitive fire. If you’ve never seen this done, you may have a Flintstone-esque vision of rubbing a couple sticks together until a flame bursts forth. If you have seen this done, you know there’s something quite magical – and challenging – about coaxing fire from wood without any modern implement.
I was excited to share this demonstration with the guys who were interested in seeing it, as the practice of using a bowdrill set (see picture) to transform dead wood into a dancing flame regularly inspires a sense of awe, grace and gratitude.
Kneeling over the fireboard, my arm sawing back and forth, I failed to produce a coal in my first two attempts. Anxious and doubting thoughts crept forward to cushion the blow from what they were trying to convince me would be the inevitable disappointment of failure.
The third time, it turned out, was the charm. A coal was “busted” and carefully transferred to the tinder nest. Leaning in to guide my breath into the smoking bundle of dried grasses, I prayed for the life of this fire to emerge. A few breaths later, that prayer was answered. The guys who witnessed the birth of fire in this way for the first time variously expressed their own versions of wonder and appreciation at the sight of it.
In response to one participant’s amazement of the transformation, I said, “The fire is in the wood. It just needs a combination of care, friction and skill to draw it forth.”
I’ve been reflecting on this since then; wondering what fire is within me that is seeking to be born through the friction of life challenges? When I feel under pressure and in the grind of life – whether a personal crisis, interpersonal conflict, or struggling with anxieties about the state of the world – can I use the friction and intensity of these experiences to transform some of the old dead wood of my ego to bring forth the light and heat needed to navigate and propel me through to a more vibrant, nourishing and meaningful relationship to life.
I invite you to ask yourself, with sufficient care, friction and skill,
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What challenges are you facing these days that are demanding your light to shine?
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What psycho-emotional dead wood are you willing to sacrifice in order to live more freely?
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What fire lives within you that you long to bring to life?
If you are – or someone you know is – a guy who’s interested in exploring these questions and finding a community of men who support each other in living meaningful lives, you may be interested to learn more about our next Wild Inner Stillness retreat. You can do so by navigating to the retreat page on this site.
